“I will kill the teddy bear!” I screamed above the mob of ten year olds. “Nekecám! I’m not kidding!” I jiggled the bear by his ear for effect and for a moment the manic classroom slowed down to look at me and the already half-decapitated bear whose stuffing was poking out of a tear in the seam of its neck.
In that second of shock – a second I have come to recognize over the course of this year that briefly holds the attention of the wild ones and gives just the smallest platform for a desperate teacher’s next move – I wondered how I got there, with my peculiar hostage and my classroom of the world’s cutest savages. Hadn’t it been just a week ago these same children had been well behaved angels in what I will always remember as the miraculously perfect lesson?
Yes. But it’s a story.
A recent discovery.
American candy bars are not very interesting.
Having tried the many and varying kinds of chocolate bars, candies and confections here in Prague, as well as in Madrid and Stuttgart, I can honestly say that American candy – though wholesome and good – is pretty boring. Save a few exceptional rarities, the American candy bar is basically the same composition of chocolate, nuts, caramel and nougat filling. That explains why the Snickers bar is the King Candy is our homeland and other chocolate bars fall to the wayside of personal preference and odd taste. They are the dependents of picky eaters.
Don’t believe me?
Someone mailed me a box full of chocolate from home (for which I shall be eternally grateful) and, because I have an extremely odd obsession with food and because I was a little bored, I decided to do a photo shoot.
The Snickers Bar
Chocolate, Nuts, Caramel, Nougat, and American Spirit
The Milky Way
Chocolate, Caramel, Nougat
The 3 Muskateers
The Baby Ruth
Chocolate, Nuts, Caramel
Not pictured: The Payday, nuts, caramel